Another attempt...anyone have any tips? they'd be appreciated uh yes please and thank you

~~~~
'This is an emergency
a test of the broadcasting system.'
i'm speaking to you all in urgency.
i have fallen and i'm not alone
silence was once a friend
Did i cast the first stone?
i don't know, why pretend?
tomorrow might be good for something
but for now..today and yesterday are the same thing
you might not care and give me a dead eyed stare
i wont notice. i'll be blinded by my own tears
i wonder what i'll think after ten, twenty years
maybe i'lll wonder where i went
just like i do now, wonder how time was passed and spent
i'm ashamed of being broken in
lay it down
i cant escape from where i've been.
i've said enough, enough by now.
i'll come wasted
answer the whys first, then i'll ask how.


Please stay calm
Don't crowd the exists
they're locked..I already tried
when did our hearts die?
its all a bold faced lie
and still, still nothing is done
everyday we're getting older that much colder
history is now our fairy tales
we go through the empty motions
didn't you know? apathy is now at record sales
collect shiny junk to temporarly satisfy emotions.
the silence gets us nowhere
the shaking of heads and sad condemning words
means nothing, death is enacted, lives are still stripped bare
i'm not calling for arms, not for raised swords.
there are other ways to fight for rights.
other ways..
Blood wont wash it clean.
don't care? pretty soon we all will.
i want to see change.. but first i have to be what it is i mean.

'Please line up in an orderly fashion
Don't push and shove, everyone will get their dream
but first you need to take our happy pills.'
now i'll start to hear it and see the movie stills.
are their screams not loud enough for me?
are my own screams not enough?
Should I turn this up for you?
don't care to listen?
that's your decision
be remembered among the forgotten.
A head in the sand makes for an easy target.
morality a dying species.. Now 'means to an end' justifies the ill gotten?

'Can we have everyone take their seats please'
'You'll start to feel the effects of the pills shortly, until then, we ask
you to direct your attention to the large screen for a word from our sponsor. Thank you.'

~~~Deception is the conception that is forced to be our only perception~~~

note- ramblings of a mad man...tread softly

I ran for miles to find it
shattered my aspirations and motivations
to find content was my furious intent
I don't understand how i gave everything
cant argue if this is right or wrong
but this is how i have come to feel
card holder calls me to call as he sets out my deal
Its easier not to care
and pretend that all this is Godsend
'my destiny will unfold'
so we put our life on hold
waiting for the perfect of circumstances

don't you know that the world weeps for you?
the birds beckon you and the trees whisper screams..
I am going to sit and listen
vocalize, idolize no more and set to realize
not prescribed or destined
this is what they tell me
'when you're ready mohamed..when you're ready'
'I'll do it not for you' is what i whisper
'you will do no such thing, it is against the nature of your kind'
'What is it that makes me pretend im not engulfed in my own flames?'
'your own flames....your own flames mohamed'
'I don't understand? won't you just tell me the truth?'
'don't you know that the seven seas are just humanities tears?'
'...will the salty tears that sting our wounds fresh and old...drown us all?'
'we only know what is..just as you do in your heart'
'ah..the heart do you have a manual?'
'why do you still substitute a joke for a plea?'
...
'determination isn't wished upon, motivation not hoped for'
'What is it that you want from me?'
'What is that YOU want from yourself?'
'I didn't know you guys read Socrates'
we've existed and preexisted the time of Socrates...and still you substitute'
'...I still don't understand what you're telling me
'Its easier not to care and pretend than it is to try..
you deserve what you think you deserve..'
'i serve myself the worst of punishments?..'
'mohamed, you will..become a skeleton with rotting flesh'
'I cant understand what i don't allow myself to understand?'

I got up and ran, ran so far so fast
its easy not to care and pretend
'idle futures...heart wont heal if you keep tearing at the sutures'
lost cause?
or
seemingly stagnate pause?


--
contemplate what it is i implicate to complicate
Inspirations..Hesitations...Motivations..Desperation
intergrate it as i attempt to predicate what it is i indicate
realize you and me are free to be
judge me? I don't care to hold a grudge you see.
fantasize and have lies as explanations for the screaming whys

:D




'
'

well thats all for now...lol tune in for nightshots:) 

day at the park 

forward and back again...with a better focus on the mirror 

forward and back 

experimented with leaving the shuter open.. it looks brighter here then i thought it would...but yeah everythings blurring from motion 

second pic...with faster shutter  

first pic 

office 

downtown building 

this worked? 

Mind Freedom 

..this one i tried to focus on the plant..but ended up focusin on the grass lol 

plant life..such is spring of season 

high leve again w/ the old school cam 

This one..blew me away when i had it developed..i didnt think i'd get that blue lol 

i'm not sure how i took this pic..but i'm learning

tried it again..with a faster shutter speed n adjusted the focus 

My car in an alley..over exposed...took in too much light.. 

this one just aggravates me:@..its washed out or something..needs some depth heh 

I took it out today to see how much i knew...n uh...well i have alot of shots messed up..like this one was over exposed...shutter was open for too long:s 

Alrite most of you know that I returned my camera..and since then i've been looking for a cheap substitute for that little ping in the chest after the snap of a shot...heh, i've walked for days in out of flea markets, pawnshops, garage sales..etc and here i am going old school:s..I've been looking at the old manual Cameras and I now have a new love...ladies and gentlemen i'd like to introduce you to Bob ibn waynal baab...you guys can call him bob.
~
Check it out- http://www.mir.com.my/rb/photography/companies/canon/fdresources/SLRs/ae1pgrm/

Separate me from my dreams
and watch me fall.
Separate me from my family
and watch me lose warmth.
Separate me from my companions
and watch me shut.
Separate me from God
and watch me....

I am not as I were
I will not be as I am

How long must I?

The clouds were once white, I remember it was white. They grew darker as I did in age, I think. I didn't notice until it was too dark to see. Like that frog story, you throw one on a hot pan and it will jump off...Place it on a pan and slowly heat it..and it will sit there and burn. What a gruesome analogy to the life imprisoned in its slow fall. What does it take to get a drink in this place?..